Photography

I take pictures because people don't notice the world
And because someone has to.

I find myself fascinated with things
And the beauty in the world.

I think that the fact that we even exist is something
I or anyone else will never understand.

We need to notice things that are around us
And not just try to spend our lives going from point A to point B.

I love watching people's reactions to my photos,
and the way the ask, what is that?

I love it when people have to think about what it is.

I like the idea that life isn't simple,
So why should my photos be?

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Dunn Bros People Watching

I have always loved watching people and the way that they interact. That's why I love public places where I can just sit and watch people. So, I've decided that instead of doing my environmental science homework, I'm going to write about the people that I see (this is probably going to be way more interesting for me than it is going to be reading it).

Table 1: A guy sitting alone on his Apple laptop. He looks vaguely like the father from Even Stevens. Okay, actually, he looks a lot like the dad from Even Stevens. He has been dutifully working on his computer for the last hour and has a large briefcase/computer bag. He keeps looking down at a pack of newspapers/magazines/pamphlets that he has sitting next to him. He's drinking tea. Ha. He just tried to catch a fly. I like this guy. He seems like he would be a good dad. He has a vague smile on his face like either he's reading something entertaining or that's just how his face is. He just went to the bathroom, which doesn't seem like a big thing (in fact it's pretty creepy), but he left all of his stuff out on his table, except for a folder which he put away right before he left. Why would you put that much trust in the strangers around you not to steal your stuff?

Table 2: 60-something guy on a black laptop. I don't recognize the logo, but it's really interesting. He has thick black frames and keps adjusting them. He has an 8-ounce disposable cup on his table, but I think there's another one on his table along with it that's larger. This makes me think that he was trying another type of coffee but didn't want a whole lot of it. He has a forest green back back sitting on the bench next to him. He has a displeased facial expression; the corners of his mouth are turned down. He hasn't been here for long, though he seems ver interesting in what he is doing. This guy isn't very interesting.

Table 3: Woman in her early 20s. I'm sure she's a student at one of the may campuses around. About 30 minutes ago there was a guy sitting with her. They were laughing about something that was on her computer. His cup is still there, but he is no where to be seen. She is dutifully taking notes off of something on her computer. She's written over a page of notes in the past 5 or 10 minutes. I wonder who the guy she was with was, and who he is.

Table 4: A father and son (age 5) that just got here. So far they are my favorite. The dad was eating, but just finished a banana, and the little boy is eating a donut. The dad asked whether he could have some of the donut. The little kid shook his head. I like him. The boy is wearing a helmet and the dad looks slightly sweaty so i'm guessing they biked here. Not too far, but a considerable amount. the little boy keeps looking over at me. But perhaps that's because i keep looking over at him. He and his dad are talking about the pictures that are above my head. The dad is doing something with his iPhone, i really can't tell what. He has a bluetooth in, which bothers me for some reason. The little boy is wearing tractor socks. Okay, this kid is offially my favorite. Apparently what the dad was doing was taking a panoramic shot of the inside of Dunn Bros. He's showing it to his son, but the kid isn't very interested. The kid has a really nice helmet. I've decided his name should be David. I don't know what his actual name is, I'm not eavesdropping, in fact, I'm listening to music. So there. David is still eating his donut, it's identical to the one i had when I got here and i agree with him. It's very good. Oh, no! They are leaving! I liked them. Goodbye David!

Table 5: A man sitting next to me. He was here when i got here (about and hour and a half ago) and has been writing in a moleskin notebook in green ink. I love green ink. His handwriting is really nice. I wonder what he's writing. He has a small lightbulb sitting on his table. I have no idea why. This guy confounds me. He has a crumpled piece of paper sitting on his table. Earlier he was looking at that and writing in his moleskin. He is now doing something on his Blackberry/Android (not an iPhone). He brought his own cup to drink from (GO ECO GUY). The second he got up, the guy from Table 2 moved over here. Why is this table better than the other? Oh, Table 1 guy is talking to the guy who is now sitting next to him. Maybe there was too much talking.

Table 6: The table on the other side of me. An old married couple. Well, not old. Early 60s maybe. The woman, I'll call her Maybelle, is reading the newspaper. He husband, Jerry, is people watching. Or at least I think he is. I can't really see him very well through the plant that is between us. They went to Breadsmith before they got here and they got something to eat now (don't remember what they got) and they have a loaf of bread sitting on a chair next to them. Maybelle is talking about how she wants to go see an exhibit at the history Museum (yes, I know I said I wasn't eavesdropping, but my music got quiet and they were talking kinda loudly). They both have some coffee type drink and a clear glass with water.

Table 7: A guy with sunglasses on his hed. He's pretty indistinguishable, though he has a clipboard and is drawing/writing on. I think he is the manager of a construction project. He seems to be marking out plans on his clipboard. He isn't drinking anything, meaning he's pretty focused on what he's doing. He's thinking a lot about it. He seems slightly confounded by a problem that has arisen. OH! He's drinking. Lol.

I think for now that this is definitely long enough. I'll be surprised if you read all of it!

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The Other Side of the Story

Why is it that no one ever writes about the other side of the story?

You always see those Chick Flicks where the woman realizes that she doesn't love her boyfriend, she loves that guy who's always been there for her. She scampers off to live a perfect life with perfect guy in a beautiful house with beautiful children and a picket fence.

But what happens to her boyfriend? The one who thought that they would have a beautiful house with beautiful children and a picket fence. The one who thought they would be together forever. The one who loved her.

They don't write that story because no one wants to be that guy. To be left behind. It's too sad.

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I Want A Change.

I'm sick of this.
I'm sick of that look you give me.
I'm sick of ignoring you.

I'm sick of caring.
I'm sick of second hand information.
I'm sick of pretending.

I'm sick of dealing.
I'm sick of hoping you'll one day apologize.
I'm sick of this emotional tug-of war.

I want confrontation.
I want to yell and scream at you.
I want to hate you.

I want to talk.
I want you to know what you did.
I want a change.

A Letter To Myself

Dear me,

This is a letter to myself, for when I go back and reread posts, which I commonly do.

In 15 days, school will have ended. You will have taken your SAT and ACT. You will have played at graduation, and had a dance performance. You will have studied and worked and tested and been exhausted. Congratulations on being done.

But, now that that is over, you have an entire summer to finally become what you want to become.

Last summer, you changed. Or at least, you would like to believe that you changed. You became louder. You cared less about what people thought of you. You dressed nicer. You started taking more chances. You did whatever the hell you wanted to do. You put yourself out there. That was a good thing. But you can do more. You are not at your full potential yet, and you know deep down that it would only take a little work to get you there.

This is your chance. Next school year you will be a senior. This is your last chance to make an impression on that box building high school you attend. So do it.

Make your summer count. Don't be one of those people who sleep until 1 and then sit around not doing anything. It was fun last year, but it can't happen again. Take initiative. Do things. Conquer the city.

So, as I finish my post in order to finish my work so that I can do well in these last 15 days until the last bell rings and we are finally released, you have already worked and tested and been exhausted. Lucky you. But, have fun this summer. Do what you need to do so you can do what you want to do. Be who you want to be no matter what you have to do to get there. Be happy.

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Prom!

For one night, we forget everything we know.



We dress as fancy as we want.



We cling to tradition.



We pose for pictures.



We walk carefully.



We dance like no one is watching.



We stay out later than we should.



Thank you all for a wonderful evening that I will never forget.
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Past, Present and Future

The future is a scary idea. It causes anxiety to swell up. It takes planning and effort. It influences everything that we do.

We pretend that we are old. We pretend we can be responsible. We pretend we know what to do. But in actuality, we have no idea what we are doing. We are children. Just because we can drive cars, have relationships and defy our parents doesn't that we are adults.

When we were little, our parents prepared us for life. We played dress up. We played school. We played house. We idealized the older kids, wishing we were that old. Wishing we knew that much. Wishing we had that much responsibility and freedom.

Now that we have it, we focus on the past. When we could play dress up without it costing so much. When we could play school and not actually attend it. When we could play house instead of having to work hard in order to keep ours. We value the innocence and little responsibility we had when we were little.

Just for one day, I wish I could take the weight off my shoulders and run around in my backyard without anything holding me back.
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